shadow

When I learn about history it hurts my heart
To learn what my present is built on.
There are triumphs too, at least there were
before I learned of the defeated.
And now I'm not so sure
that I know right from wrong.
Standing in the shoes of your shadow
it's hard to get off the ground
and much darker than imagined.
But it's much clearer
what can never be yours
hope may as well be abandoned.
Striving for it, you hurt yourself,
understanding more fully the implications.
Because you were once the implicated.
But if your confidence depends on kicking down your shadow,
you will be the first to kick
and refuse to emancipate it.
Failing to realize your intrinsic dependency
an eternal power struggle for freedom.
Neither is desirable anyway.
When such disparity is involved,
the taste is much different on the tongue.
Equality only in nothingness.
Better to disappear entirely.